Dear Abby: Should I tell my alcoholic daughter that I took her out of my will?

DEAR ABBY: I’m a single retired grandfather in the South.My daughter, 50, has hitched her wagon to an alcoholic.

She’s circling the drain and going down with him. My grandsons are adults and scattered around the country.They are lazy and none of them has a full-time job.

We used to keep them during the summers until their mid-teens.Now I don’t hear from them unless I call, and then it’s just a bunch of one-word answers — “Fine,” “OK” and “Yup.” My daughter has no retirement savings or company retirement plan.

She doesn’t call either.She lives four hours away.

I’m certain my home, property and possessions are their planned retirement accounts.All I need to do is die.

I worked my entire life, spanning a couple of full careers, and I owe nothing to anyone.I have visions of my possessions being destroyed by a couple of alcoholics or sold off for quick cash. I have decided my estate will all be donated to my favorite charity, a worthwhile cause where it will truly mean something to people who care.

Should I let my daughter and grandkids know now, so they have an opportunity to change course and prepare, or let them be surprised after they don’t go to my funeral? — DISAPPOINTED GRANDPA IN FLORIDADEAR GRANDPA: I will assume that you have put your decision in writing and your lawyer is aware of it.Your daughter should be informed, in the context of advance planning, who will be the executor of your will, what kind of funeral or memorial you intend to have, where you have arranged to be buried and how you will be disposing of your assets. If you are concerned that it will degenerate into an unpleasant conversation, ask your attorney to serve as a buffer and do it for you.

I guarantee that word will reach your grandchildren like wildfire. DEAR ABBY: I recently met a man who, even though he asked me to sit down and have a coffee with him, then said he isn’t marriage- or dating-minded.I decided to avoid him, and I’m trying to rid m...