I dont care what experts say about gender identity I wont stop telling my kids good girl and good boy

There’s so much uncertainty in parenting in 2024, thanks to information overload, but one thing’s for sure: you’re damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.A study came out this week advising parents not to use “good girl/boy” when praising their kids, and … that’s it.I’m officially done.No disrespect to the researchers and experts, but that’s enough.

Stop it now.Thanks.Here’s the gist of what the experts say:Don’t say “good girl” or “good boy”, as it may raise issues around gender identity and self-esteem.

It also doesn’t actually give children clear feedback on what they did to earn such praise, apparently.Don’t under praise, because of that old self-esteem chestnut mentioned earlier. But don’t overdo it either, lest your kid turn into a narcissistic a–hole. Recent research suggests that inflated praise – i.e.using words such as “incredible”, “amazing” and “wonderful,” can foster narcissistic traits by causing children to have an unrealistic sense of their own competence. Constant praise is also a no-no and may mean children unconsciously feel they are doing things for adult approval, rather than for themselves. It can be bad for self-regulation and sense of identity, experts say.So do we give the kids the silent treatment??“Process praise” is apparently what we’re aiming for here, people.It’s informational, giving children feedback on their efforts and strategies in achieving an outcome.

In other words, what you want to be saying to your kid is, “I can see you tried really hard in that athletics competition, Jimmy”, rather than, “you are a winner, son!” Morning Report delivers the latest news, videos, photos and more.Please provide a valid email address.

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