Dear Abby: My husbands dream job isnt paying the bills should I make him give it up?

DEAR ABBY: I am a single man with no siblings.My elderly father passed away eight months ago.

My mother is now in hospice with a life expectancy of weeks to months.My parents have lived long and productive lives, and I’m proud of both of them.We have always been very close.

Since their terminal illnesses, I have managed to function fairly well. My problem is with certain “triggers.” For example, I can no longer go to the beach because I always remember my father’s voice welcoming me home when I returned.The worst one is when people see my childhood photos and say, “Your parents must have loved you a lot.” I know these people mean well, but I can’t help grieving over the bond I had and have lost with my parents.I plan to seek counseling, but I would appreciate any advice you would have about reducing the effect of these triggers.— THEIR SON IN SAN DIEGODEAR SON: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your father.

You may need help coping with the pain of losing him, as well as dealing with your mother’s sad prognosis.When a loved one dies, there are, of course, bittersweet memories.Managing them is an individual process. If you haven’t joined a grief support group, I urge you to find one.

If the group setting doesn’t provide enough help for the overwhelming emotions you are feeling, a licensed psychotherapist can offer more support.The people helping your mother with her hospice care surely can suggest some resources for you.Please don’t put it off.

Start now.DEAR ABBY: How long would you give your partner to get a full-time job?What if that partner was helpful in other areas of the household, brought in rental income from a home he owned and helped with the kids? I am in a predicament. My spouse has been working as an adjunct professor since we met and has remained in that career for 17 years without benefits or a salary that can support us.We have children now, and I have been working my tail off for more than 10 years to provide...